From "The Scarab" by James Tate

For my birthday, Donna gave me a scarab from
Egypt, which she said was thousands of years old, and
said to have special powers. Its a beetle carved from
stone. "What kind of powers?" I asked her. "It'll keep
you from being eaten by the hippopotamus god. It'll stop
you from bumping into pyramids. And it will make you
the sexual prince of the universe," she said. "Those are the
three things I wanted most in life. What a great present.
Thanks sweetheart," I said. "Of course that last part
just works with me as your lover," she added. "Believe me,
I fully understood that, " I said. "To tell you the truth,
Peter, I have no idea what kind of special powers it's
supposed to have. . . . "

. . . I was distracted, agitated. I
kept looking around the office for something. At first, I
didn't know what I was looking for. The, slowly, it dawned
on me. The hippopotamus god was coming for me. I reached
in my pocket and clutched the scarab. It was coming, and I
was ready.